Do you ever get that feeling like you are so in control. Everything is going your way and you are on top of all the stresses of life. Then all of the sudden its a bit overwhelming and you can't get in control and life is rushing by and you are racing to keep up. You're stuck watching and you know you should be running, but instead your in a fog. Zoned out. People talking and suddenly without realizing it you have quit listening. It's like you have been dropped on your head. You were flying and suddenly wham.
Today I was literally dropped on my head during cheer. Nothing could really be done and it was probably mostly my fault, but it still didn't feel great. All fear of a possible concussion is gone now, i read on the internet and did some mini home tests and i think i'm okay so you don't have to worry. two other girls were hurt today and one even needed stitches so i consider myself lucky! still be careful out there, its a rough world...
mini rant... you know what i hate, when you do something and you then just have to wait and see what happens. so rather than stewing over it all the time you decide just to put it from your mind and not think about it. of course what do you spend all day thinking about? exactly what you decided to forget. it is the worst just sitting and waiting. knowing something is out of your hands and never really sure if you will know what is going to happen. i hate the fact that now, i have done my part and i just get to wait and see. or i will very likely just get to wait, and wait, and wait forever never knowing how the other party reacted or anything. there is nothing i can do and the ball is in someone else's court likely to never be passed back. this is tough. And i think technology has made it way worse. i am so used to instant answers, instant replies, instant information, instant boiling water (thanks to our old but wonderfully hot stove), that waiting has become something that i am not good at. i know that i will probably have to wait at least three weeks but i can't stop thinking about it and hoping that somehow i'll get what i want in two days. patience is a virtue, and i definitely do not posses it.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Friday, October 22, 2010
Life at the Moment
Well this morning i woke up just exhausted and in SO much pain! i love it! wanna know why? okay i'll tell you....
this week i joined the cheer squad. it all started on saturday when Chrissy and i decided that we wanted to watch a football game. i watched the cheerleaders and suddenly there was nothing i could do, i had to talk to someone and try to get on the team. so i did. tuesday i went to practice and didn't really do a lot because they were learning the new routine for saturday and i wasn't in it. so i watched and just learned the dance and stuff. i was a bit disappointed when i got home, but i thought it would get better. then thursday i came to practice and was asked to take the spot of a girl who quit the team. so i got to learn an entire routine (mostly stunting and i don't have to do the dance part) in a day. it was the best thing ever! i am mostly a front spot and flying twice but i love it. i'm pathetic because i am so sore but you know what that's okay because i haven't cheered since like march... maybe april. but anyways it is so fun to be back cheering! now my pressure is to remember the routine, not drop anyone (especially the girl who flips over another stunt into my arms) and to learn all the cheers by saturday so that i don't make a fool of myself :) GOOD LUCK!
now i would like to take a moment just to talk about my wonderful grandparents, and friends back at home... (sorry parents you will get a post eventually i promise!)
when i went home a few weekends ago my Nana and Pumpa being the wonderful kind people they are insisted on sending me back with a care package. at the time i was thinking ... oh that's not really necessary, but i was touched that they wanted to do that for me. Now i am just overwhelmed with how much i love them for it! they sent me homemade jam, and jelly, and fruit leather, and soups and apple sauce, and i just love it! I had the best meal last night with zero effort thanks to them and my wonderful Allison who also sent me back with homemade buns :) i got back from class around 6:45 ish completely exhausted from a long day and i hadn't eaten since around ten in the morning. rather than having to cook anything, i just took some soup, heated it up, put on some cheese, buttered buns and ate a wonderful home cooked healthy meal! it was the best! Thanks Nana and Pumpa and Alli! your all the greatest!
this week i joined the cheer squad. it all started on saturday when Chrissy and i decided that we wanted to watch a football game. i watched the cheerleaders and suddenly there was nothing i could do, i had to talk to someone and try to get on the team. so i did. tuesday i went to practice and didn't really do a lot because they were learning the new routine for saturday and i wasn't in it. so i watched and just learned the dance and stuff. i was a bit disappointed when i got home, but i thought it would get better. then thursday i came to practice and was asked to take the spot of a girl who quit the team. so i got to learn an entire routine (mostly stunting and i don't have to do the dance part) in a day. it was the best thing ever! i am mostly a front spot and flying twice but i love it. i'm pathetic because i am so sore but you know what that's okay because i haven't cheered since like march... maybe april. but anyways it is so fun to be back cheering! now my pressure is to remember the routine, not drop anyone (especially the girl who flips over another stunt into my arms) and to learn all the cheers by saturday so that i don't make a fool of myself :) GOOD LUCK!
now i would like to take a moment just to talk about my wonderful grandparents, and friends back at home... (sorry parents you will get a post eventually i promise!)
when i went home a few weekends ago my Nana and Pumpa being the wonderful kind people they are insisted on sending me back with a care package. at the time i was thinking ... oh that's not really necessary, but i was touched that they wanted to do that for me. Now i am just overwhelmed with how much i love them for it! they sent me homemade jam, and jelly, and fruit leather, and soups and apple sauce, and i just love it! I had the best meal last night with zero effort thanks to them and my wonderful Allison who also sent me back with homemade buns :) i got back from class around 6:45 ish completely exhausted from a long day and i hadn't eaten since around ten in the morning. rather than having to cook anything, i just took some soup, heated it up, put on some cheese, buttered buns and ate a wonderful home cooked healthy meal! it was the best! Thanks Nana and Pumpa and Alli! your all the greatest!
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
The Beauties of Being a Freshman
1. living on your own for the first time
2. having roommates..fighting with those roommates... loving those rooommates
3. being on campus and actually belonging. not feeling like the little kid pretending. okay so maybe you still feel like it, but you aren't playing dress-up anymore it's actually real!
4. having a crush on every guy you see. tutor, fhe bro, home teacher, cute boy who smiles in class, boy who opens door, they're all free game ;)
5. gaining your own identity... changing that identity... being you, not someone's girlfriend, fiance, wife, you just get to be you for now. the rest of that lasts the rest of your life.
6. going to football games, dance nights, random concerts... all the stuff that is "lame" but your a freshman so you can pretend you don't know and get away with it.
7. being able to have no idea where your life is going and you know what? that's okay! ... for now...
8. loving university just because it's sweet and new and there is that feeling that it's not really that permanent. (just wait a couple years and i'm sure that wears off)
9. going out to dinners and realizing that people don't see you as some little annoying kid but like your an actual person... well some of them
10. just being... moving breathing doing homework eating. LEARNING and being able to still be so excited about it!
2. having roommates..fighting with those roommates... loving those rooommates
3. being on campus and actually belonging. not feeling like the little kid pretending. okay so maybe you still feel like it, but you aren't playing dress-up anymore it's actually real!
4. having a crush on every guy you see. tutor, fhe bro, home teacher, cute boy who smiles in class, boy who opens door, they're all free game ;)
5. gaining your own identity... changing that identity... being you, not someone's girlfriend, fiance, wife, you just get to be you for now. the rest of that lasts the rest of your life.
6. going to football games, dance nights, random concerts... all the stuff that is "lame" but your a freshman so you can pretend you don't know and get away with it.
7. being able to have no idea where your life is going and you know what? that's okay! ... for now...
8. loving university just because it's sweet and new and there is that feeling that it's not really that permanent. (just wait a couple years and i'm sure that wears off)
9. going out to dinners and realizing that people don't see you as some little annoying kid but like your an actual person... well some of them
10. just being... moving breathing doing homework eating. LEARNING and being able to still be so excited about it!
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Pictures
These are the pictures I took for my Heroic Journey class.
I want to get a nice camera and take nice pictures. There is just so much beauty in life!
My Beautiful Pyper
A delicious Candy Apple i bought from an adorable little boy selling door to door :)
(this was because i needed a picture with an apple theme)
And my favorite... a landscape picture from beautiful Magrath!
ps i took about 100 pictures while home this weekend :)
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Back In Idaho
Wow good to be home! (well my part time home i guess) It was so nice to go back to beautiful Magrath and Canada! Our home and native land. i can't believe how beautiful it is back home. i took around 100 pictures because i need a landscape picture for my heroic journey class. now the problem is i just can't decide which is the most beautiful! i love it back home and i don't think i would ever have appreciated the beauty that is magrath unless i had left it.
now its back to school, and homework. got a bit of catching up to do but i think it will be fine. last week i was complaining about having too much free time on my hands... be careful what you wish for eh?
ok so right now i am sitting in my room blaring classical music into my already aching head. why you ask? because i am taking a humanities class and i absolutely love it! we are required to memorize all these classical music pieces, 25 to be exact. we need to know the composer, name of the piece, and the style. this would seem like an odious assignment yes? no! i love it. i also loved having to memorize 30 pieces of art, their painters, and the style. i just feel like i am learning so much and it is just making me so cultured! this weekend i was discussing with my bro. chance how much better life can be if we know how to appreciate beauty and i think that is what the humanities does for you. it just makes you a better person because you can appreciate life more! and there is so much to appreciate:)
now its back to school, and homework. got a bit of catching up to do but i think it will be fine. last week i was complaining about having too much free time on my hands... be careful what you wish for eh?
ok so right now i am sitting in my room blaring classical music into my already aching head. why you ask? because i am taking a humanities class and i absolutely love it! we are required to memorize all these classical music pieces, 25 to be exact. we need to know the composer, name of the piece, and the style. this would seem like an odious assignment yes? no! i love it. i also loved having to memorize 30 pieces of art, their painters, and the style. i just feel like i am learning so much and it is just making me so cultured! this weekend i was discussing with my bro. chance how much better life can be if we know how to appreciate beauty and i think that is what the humanities does for you. it just makes you a better person because you can appreciate life more! and there is so much to appreciate:)
Monday, October 11, 2010
Just A Bit About Me
I am currently in University at BYU-I and absolutely loving it! I love my classes and my family and my roommates and just everything.
Okay so far I just sound like an overly happy kind of annoying person, but I'm really not. I used to consider myself a bit of a pessimist, but I managed to change that somehow. I still get down, don't get me wrong, but I just seem to feel like life is generally good most of the time.
Mostly I am writing this so my blog doesn't look so blank. I'll come up with more interesting things to post later!
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